We review many different types of products, services, locations and entertainment here at Offensively Patriotic. It’s not really possible to rate music on the same categories as restaurants, so here you can see what each rating means and how we rate that product or service. You’ll also find an explanation on the categories we rate them on.

Each rated category is given a score of 0 through 10 with half points possible. The final score is an average of those scores.

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

FEATURES/OPTIONS

What features and options are available for the app or service.

PRICING/VALUE

Pricing options and the value of the app or service.

TRANSPARENCY/POLICY/GIMICKS

Is the app or service straightforward with the end customer? Are there any gimicks?

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

WRITING

How well the written content is written. Is it comprehendible? Does the author stick to a narrative?

STORY/MESSAGE

How good is the story? Is there a message and how easy is it to understand?

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

FUNCTION

Does the clothing set out to fit the function it’s meant to and how well it does so.

STYLE

How nice is the design? Does it match the typical use case? Will it fit in with your other clothing?

COMFORT

How well the clothing item fits and feels.

PRICING/VALUE

What’s the value of the given item when compared to similar clothing items?

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

EFFECTIVENESS

How well the supplement does what it says it should do.

INGREDIENT PROFILE

How many ingredients are in the product and are they needed? What’s the quality of the ingredients?

PRICING/VALUE

Value of the product.

TASTE/SMELL

How good or bad does the product taste and smell.

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

MUSIC/SOUND

How good the music, sound effects and soundtrack is.

ACTING

How good is the acting. Do the actors portray the characters well?

DIRECTING/EDITING/VISUALS

This is the overall cinematography rating of the film.

PLOT/STORY/MESSAGE

How good is the story? Is there a message and how easy is it to understand? Does the plot make sense, especially with what the story lays itself out as?

ADAPTATION

This scoring category is reserved for those movies that adapts a book, video game, etc. It rates how well it keeps to the source material and adapts that into the film.

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

PRODUCTION/MUSIC ELEMENTS

This rating scores how well the individual music elements are done and then put together. Bass, chorus, tempo, etc.

MESSAGING/MEANING

Is there a message and is it a good message like fighting through your troubles? What’s the meaning behind the message and again, good or bad?

ALBUM COHESIVENESS/THEME

This rating is reserved for albums and scores how well all songs fit together and work to create a theme.

LYRICS/BARS

Do the words make sense? How well do the bars flow in rap?

ARTIST BLEND

This is reserved for albums where artists collaborate and rates how good or bad the artists sound and work together.

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

FUNCTION

Does the clothing set out to fit the function it’s meant to and how well it does so.

STYLE

How nice is the design? Does it match the typical use case? Will it fit in with your other clothing?

COMFORT

This rating is reserved for albums and scores how well all songs fit together and work to create a theme.

PRICING/VALUE

Value of the gear compared to other similar products.

PATRIOTISM/WOKENESS

This rates how patriotic or “woke” the reviewed item is or the company behind said item. A higher score means it’s less woke and more patriotic. Maybe the item is made in America or the company gives money to veterans, etc.

STORY/MESSAGE

How good is the story? Is there a message and how easy is it to understand?

GRAPHICS

There are many ways to design game graphics in today’s modern world. This isn’t simply how “good” or “real” something looks. A game that uses hand drawn graphics or cell-shading won’t get a low score for not looking “real.” This rating will compare other games that look similar or uses similar designs, as well as looking at how lazy graphics may be done.

GAMEPLAY

How good is the gameplay? Is it boring or addictive?

SOUND/MUSIC

A score for the sound effects, music and/or soundtrack.

CONTROLS

How well does the game control? Are there options for control input?